siiigh. If only life was this carefree. =.= I recently got my latest Super Junior merchandise, Boys in City III. This was the last time, at the moment, where everyone was perfectly together and looked very happy. Watching this made me feel ecstatic and very sad at the same time. Ecstatic because it brought me back to how I first found Super Junior. Bunch of 13 carefree boys who played around and cried when they were at their happiest, on and off camera. It looked like Hong Kong was exclusively theirs and there was pure vacation these boys that, I sure am, have been wanting to do for such a long time since their debut. Watching this made me very sad because reality has hit me again. Things will never be the same again. I was 18 when I came to love Super Junior and I grew with them. Although I wasn't there from the very beginning but I am proud to say that I saw them growing up right before my eyes. I am almost 22 now and Super Junior is on their way celebrating their 5th birhtday. Just like any normal human growing up, things you can handle too in life grows up and this has hit me. Certain things in life are becoming inevitable to handle.
Have I really taken things for granted when everything seemed so perfect? Did I not really see it coming that things might end up like this? I still miss you. You might not know how much hurt I was when I found things might end just like this but I still miss you... and long for you. Because I am only a fan and I only know how to love you as a fan, I feel so powerless.